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20 Biggest Deal Breakers in a Relationship 

Deal breakers in a relationship

What do you think a deal-breaker is?  The thoughts, the feelings, the behaviors, or any such things that lead you in distress are the deal breakers in a relationship.  

A deal-breaker is an aspect to speculate the dos and don’ts in a relationship. It’s that little stuff that can urge you to think, “Oh, I think I am done. I cannot move forward this way any longer.” And at such times, it doesn’t matter how deeply in love you are. What matters is the emotional damage, the bucket load of questioning your self-worth, and limitless compromises. 

20 Deal Breakers in a Relationship 

Deal breakers in a relationship

Don’t just glance through the headings. Read the entire article so you can make an informed decision. Although, this article doesn’t intend to encourage breakups. It’s just an eye-opener kind of article, so you can cut yourself from bonds that aren’t doing you any good. “Am I really happy? Is this something I can deal with for a lifetime?” are the questions you should ask yourself. 

1. They’re selfish

A relationship requires commitment and compromises. If one of the two partners cannot think beyond their needs, their moods, and their lifestyle, then it’s not something that will keep you happy for long. 

If a relationship is lacking the give and take aspect, it is one of the biggest deal breakers in a relationship. When you love your partner and want to be an everlasting relationship, it has to be a two-sided one, and in all aspects. 

2. They won’t introduce you to their friends or family

Deal breakers in a relationship

When we are at the peak of our relationship, we want our family and friends to know about it because they’re a big part of our lives. In this scenario, we want our inner circle to accept us as a couple.  

Meeting the parents or friends is not something that happens when you’re casually dating. But the moment you know that this is going somewhere and that your bond is a beautiful one, it’s time to introduce it to your loved ones. But if your partner wants to keep the relationship a secret, it’s a red flag! Is it a dirty fantasy that they should hide? Absolutely not, and so it is one of the massive deal breakers in a relationship.

3. They aren’t there when you need them

Problems are a part of everyone’s life but it does not mean that we lose hope. It is during such times that we need someone to comfort us at our lowest. And when in love, we usually expect our partners to be with us during those tough times. But a lack of their presence is one of the absolute deal breakers in a relationship. I mean, what’s the point, anyway?  

4. They don’t value your opinion

Acceptance and agreement are very vital ingredients of a relationship. All of us have our principles, values, and opinions. Sometimes one of us cannot agree with our partner, and that is okay. But always disregarding your opinion, thinking they are always right, and not even taking a moment to review your opinion… that’s just not okay! Surely, it is one of the popular deal breakers in a relationship as expressed by many who shared they simply didn’t find their knowledge or intelligence valued.

5. They have anger issues.

Deal breakers in a relationship

Getting angry is normal but anger issues are not normal in a relationship. You will eventually start tip-toeing around your partner, afraid of what might trigger him. Sometimes, such partners also end up indulging in dangerous activities. It isn’t a healthy alliance. Fear has no place in a loving relationship, and if you’re too afraid to even be yourself, it’s problem, and undoubtedly among the topmost of the deal breakers in a relationship. 

6. They’re impolite.

Being impolite is also one of the most significant deal breakers in a relationship? If a partner speaks rudely, time and again, not just in privacy but also when around others, it’s one of the sure-shot deal breakers in a relationship. It’s something we shouldn’t allow, under any circumstance! 

7. They’re obsessed with their job.

Overdoing anything is irritating. Love should be nourished by spending time with your companion, strengthening the bond. Just like spending twenty-four hours a day isn’t normal, neither is obsessing about work. Then, there is only one priority in their lives, and if you’re not a priority, what’s the relationship like? Something to think about! 

8. Jealousy

Jealousy comes from possessiveness and let’s admit it, we all enjoy it, but only to an extend. A limited amount of jealousy can lead to a healthy relationship and can strengthen our bond, giving the message that they fear enough to lose you. But, it can be also one of those silliest deal breakers in a relationship when the level of possessiveness crosses a limit. 

Demanding passwords, forcing you to cut off from friendships, wanting to always be around you, not letting you go anywhere by yourself, checking your phone, etc. are unhealthy habits! 

9. Controlling

Funny deal breakers in a relationship

From children to adults, no one wants to be controlled by others.  Everyone needs their own space in their life. An interfering partner might slip into an inappropriate behavior in the longer run. None of us need someone guiding all our steps, decisions, expenses, or faith! It’s very unhealthy and one of the biggest deal breakers in a relationship. 

10. Gut feeling 

Funny deal breakers in a relationship

You can be right about your relationship but it might be different for others. It’s not compulsory to love someone deeply forever. Love is not enough to keep a bond healthy. Some thoughts make us question the chemistry we share with our partners, and who better to listen to than your instinct?  

It’s our relationship, and let alone others, if we are not so sure about our alliance then maybe it isn’t a sign to miss.

11. Ego issues

“EGO…” What do you think, is good or bad? To be honest, ego, the three-letter word, is a very delicate part of our intellect.

Ego between lovers is good (if within a limit), as it can push a relationship to move forward to a better experience. But if ego takes the face of competition, that’s not okay for the future. Several heartbroken people testify ego being one of the deal breakers in a relationship, only because one partner refuses to see their special one with love and rather see them with the will to defeat. Ego clashes are common but unhealthy! 

12. Materialistic views

Do you want a long-lasting relationship? What if your partner is materialistic? Then it’s what’s called one of the setbacks or deal breakers in a relationship. A materialistic partner, who weighs things above people will never be happy, thus passing on the same energy to you.  

They will be curious about your wallet, your income, financial background, and make unfair demands. Of course, they may love you a lot, but they only love things more. 

13. Unambitious

I have seen many relationships where one is not ambitious, leading to life-altering fights between a couple. Honestly, it’s boring to live with an unambitious person. Ambition doesn’t have to always do with a career, but someone who only claims to want things but doesn’t move a finger towards it, they’re unambitious. Even if one’s ambition is to be a full-time mother or a stay-at-home dad, it’s still keeping the spark alive!. 

14. Lying

Sometimes, we lie to protect our partner’s feelings. But when it becomes a habit, it can become one of the heartbreaking deal breakers in a relationship. A fear of conflict isn’t the green signal to lie. Two people who love one another, and genuinely so, will never resort to lies to save the day!  

Speaking of heartbreak, you might also want to read our story My First Heartbreak- This isn’t how fairytales end.

15. Communication gap

Deal breakers

Communication is the oxygen of our relationship; without it, a relationship may die! A non-communicative partner gives the feeling of being disinterested in the relationship. But someone who genuinely cares will make time, even if it is just a moment. Reasons like, “Do we have to right now? Can we talk about it later? I’m busy!” and the like are unacceptable, hence adding on to the list of deal breakers in a relationship. 

16. High expectations

Expectations from our partner are relevant in a relationship but high expectations can be one of the deal breakers in a relationship. It leads to feelings of hurt, disappointment, conflicts, pressure, and ultimately, heartbreak. Expect only as much as you can fulfill and vice versa.

17. Trust issues

 Trust is one of the threads that connects two people. Without trust, there is no relationship; it’s just two people! And if you or your partner don’t trust each other enough, then it’s one of those deal breakers in a relationship that has ended many love stories.  

Lack of trust begins with tiny arguments and ultimately leads to feelings of hurt. This will keep you way distant from true happiness and confidence in your relationship.  

18. Gender defined roles

Normally, even in today’s era, some believe that women can only do a particular kind of work and men are the bread earners of a family. With time, women stepped out of their houses, but couldn’t find any relief or support for household work.  

A lot has changed today, though. Many men have embraced the working womanhood clan with warmth and have become their pillars. But if you feel like you’re in a relationship that often throws at your gender-biased dialogues/expectations, it’s time to stand up for yourself. It might interest you to know that several Millenials have reported this issue as one of the biggest and common deal breakers in a relationship. 

We recently published an article on should a man help around the house. You can read it here.

19. Oversensitivity

Sensitivity is a human’s most beautiful attribute. Sometimes, it also leads to obsessive thoughts. Highly sensitive people “HSPs” or empaths experience depth emotions. They can feel others’ pain and take it as their own, which can ruin a relationship. 

Being oversensitive means that sometimes, a partner could take advantage of the niceness. On another angle, if your partner feels hurt or upset about even the teensiest of the things, then you’re losing your time together in fixing their mood, again, becoming one of the deal breakers in a relationship.

20. Financial dependence/independence

Financial dependence or inference is one of the new issues between couples, especially for newly married ones. It is vital to discuss the issue of finances between couples so it doesn’t lead to an awful breakup of either one feel less or more. Depending on one partner too much, or being so independent that your partner doesn’t feel like a part of your life, are both causes for deal breakers in a relationship


Have you come across any other reasons in your or others’ lives that add to this list of deal breakers in a relationship? Let us know in the comments below! If you liked this article, then give us a like and rate this post. Want to read more articles like these? Subscribe to us for free and we’ll send it to you personally by email.

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