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50 Questions to Help Build Intimacy in Relationships

questions to help build intimacy in relationships

Over the past week, we’ve been working on building intimacy in our relationships. But it doesn’t just magically happen. Efforts, adjustments, and communication play a vital role in building intimacy. If you are one of those couples who also believes and agrees that intimacy is the key to a happy relationship, here are some questions to help build intimacy in relationships. Not that you need to sit down across from each other and make it sound like an interview. That would be like sucking all the fun out of it. How should you do it then?

These questions to help build intimacy in relationships are those that you can slip into your regular conversations. Over time, these questions will also become as effortless and carefree as your relationship and it will all seem as easy as anything else. Don’t make it sound like you’ve mugged these questions. Glance through these questions, reflect upon those that you think would help you understand your partner better, and then ask whenever in a moment.

Remember not to spring these questions to help build intimacy grandly lest it scares your partner. Keep the process natural. It’s not an examination!

Take a look at these 50 questions to help build intimacy in relationships. Good luck!

Tips to ask these questions to help build intimacy

tips to build intimacy in relationships

As I said, you cannot spring these questions on your partner and interrogate them. That’s too much pressure, and also scary, to be honest! Take a look at these tips.

  1. Don’t make a big deal out of them but don’t take them lightly either. Intimacy is the soul of every relationship.
  2. Make eye contact and maintain it while asking these questions that help build intimacy.
  3. Be relaxed, so it doesn’t come across as an examination.
  4. Don’t react. Only respond.
  5. If you see the discomfort in your partner, withdraw the conversation.

Looking to build emotional intimacy in your relationship? Click here to read some habits you can include!

Questions to help build intimacy in relationships

Before we begin with the questions, let’s understand who can benefit from these questions. Only people in new relationships? No! Besides those people in new relationships, these questions to help build intimacy are also for those couples who are suddenly feeling distant from each other. You want to rework on coming close, and these questions will subconsciously help you two to bond all over again.

Asking deep, intimate questions encourages one to introspect about their needs from their relationship. This profound thinking and conversation will have a positive impact on your intimacy as a couple. Over time, these questions to help build intimacy will bridge the distance that you’re feeling now.

For those who are in a new relationship and are in the phase of getting to know each other on a deeper and more committed level will also benefit from these questions because it will be like knowing the person’s deepest thoughts than just what they tell you.

building intimacy in relationships

  1. What’s your favorite childhood memory?
  2. What’s the one thing about yourself that you would love the most?
  3. What three things in your life could you not imagine doing without?
  4. When something happens, who is the first person you want to tell?
  5. What’s one of the most adventurous things you have ever done?
  6. Who are you closest to in your family?
  7. What makes you the happiest?
  8. What do you have on your bucket list?
  9. Who do you admire?
  10. Imagine redoing something in your life. What would it be?

Did you notice how the first ten questions to help build intimacy are more about your partner and less about your relationship? That’s totally okay! One shouldn’t feel like everything you do is about you as a couple. Taking an active interest in your partner’s interest is one of the best ways to build emotional intimacy. And don’t just do it because it’s written here. Do it because you mean it. Because you genuinely want to take interest in his or her life.

physical intimacy in relationships

11. When did you first fall in love with me?

12. What do you love the most about us?

13. When you visualize our future, what do you see?

14. Do you have any fantasies that you would like to explore?

15. How would you describe me to someone?

16. What do you think is the most fun thing that we do as a couple?

17. What is something that I do that annoys you most?

18. What would your choice be for your favorite date night?

19. Is there something that we did often that we don’t do anymore?

20. What are the things that you worry about most?

The second section of the questions to help build intimacy is a mix of individual, couple, and future questions. Some will help you go down memory lane and some will help you create a future that you’ve probably not been able to think about.

Quick question- Did you know there are 10 types of intimacy?

building intimacy

21. What was the greatest lesson that you learned from your parents’ relationship?

22. If you could plan the perfect date with me, what would that include?

23. What’s something that you’d like to try with me, but that you’re too scared to try?

24. Does anything about our relationship scare you?

25. How can I make you feel more appreciated?

26. What can I do to make you feel better when you are upset?

27. If our love story was a movie, what movie does it most closely resemble?

28. What are some of the little things I do that kind of drive you nuts but also that you secretly like about me?

29. Do you think I give you enough space in our relationship?

30. What’s your take on gender-biased roles?

Yet another section of mixed questions to help build intimacy, and you’re sure to feel closer to your partner. In the next section, I’ve enlisted some questions that will work on your physical intimacy.

questions to bond

31. Is there a sexual fantasy we can fulfill?

32. What do you love the most in bed?

33. Do you believe in role-playing?

34. Are you satisfied with the physical aspects of our relationship?

35. How can I keep the physical intimacy between us strong throughout the day, outside of the bedroom?

36. Where and how do you like to be touched?

37. What would make our sexual relationship better for you?

38. Do you enjoy cuddling to sleep?

39. Would a change in my physical appearance change the amazing physical intimacy we have?

40. Do you like talking about sex at all?

They’re very simple questions, but they’ll take you a long way when it comes to fulfilling your desires. These questions to help build intimacy in your relationships will not just work on the other types of intimacy, but also boost your physical intimacy because you will have a better understanding of each other’s needs!

intimacy building

41. What is something you have always wanted to tell me but couldn’t?

42. On a scale of 1 to 10, how comfortable are you with me?

43. What do you think is the biggest strength of our relationship?

44. What is the biggest area for improvement in our relationship?

45. If I had a life-changing career opportunity across the country, would you pack up your life and move with me?

46. When was the last time you cried, and why?

47. What is one deep thing you have learned from me?

48. Would you ever like to have kids?

49. What is one thing that you think is unforgivable in a relationship?

50. What are your views on cheating?

There, we have 50 questions to help build intimacy in relationships. All you have to do now is find the ones that best fit your relationship and randomly ask your partner. Don’t force them to answer. Let it happen in its own way. Sometimes, you’ll receive a one-word answer, and sometimes, one question will lead to another. Go with the flow and follow your instinct.

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Hemali Adhiya

Hemali Adhiya is the co-founder and author of the e-magazine Love Smitten. Alongside writing and editing for several other websites, she hosts a YouTube Channel- Total Angrezi. Traveling is her way to unwind, and she loves recording these experiences!

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