Hemali AdhiyaThe season of dating is all flowery; just like we heard in the recent movie, Love Aaj Kal, the sky seems pink and everything turns purple. The jitters of looking fabulous on our first date, the anticipation of how the first kiss would turn out, and the waiting game to see if there is a future. If you are dating right now, you know all the efforts you take to feel and make your partner happy. But if you are married, then you probably need to jog your memory and bring back the dating spark into your marriage.
The part when we plan our wedding, the wedding, the honeymoon, and the fact that people call us newly-weds for about six months to a year sure keeps our excitement alive. Everything is new, and we cannot get enough of each other. But soon things become mundane, and we stop trying. Taking an effort to feel young and break out of the routine doesn’t remain a priority anymore. And that is precisely where all the problems begin.
Let’s take a look at 10 Dating Habits that we should include in our marriage so that we don’t become just another married couple when we can forever live as boyfriends and girlfriends.
1. Don’t let go of the hands
If I ask you to close your eyes and remember the first time you felt the touch of your partner’s hand, you will smile ear to ear. The first brush against each other might have made you shudder, and walking hand in hand would be something you would look forward to every time you separated after a happy date. Why not now? Yes, it doesn’t feel the same as before. One doesn’t shudder, nor is it something we look forward to, but, after marriage, it represents the care, the affection, and the fact that you still enjoy each other’s company. So… Don’t let go!
2. Surprise Gifts
Remember how we used to buy surprises out of the blue, without the need for an occasion? Then why do we just take our partner to the mall and ask them to choose what they want, or take our husband’s card and get a gift on his behalf? A married couple lives with one another. Now you actually know what your partner needs, and trust you me, it would make them stay in awe of you if you surprise them with that thing. If not, just get something in your budget that you think your partner will love without looking forward to birthdays or anniversaries.
3. Plan Dates
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Of course, going out on dates doesn’t occur to many because married couples now live in the same house. But, the point is that very house is the place where you live your routine. Even if you make a special dinner, one of them still needs to cook, clean, lay the table, etc. While dating, we always choose a cozy restaurant, plan all the things we would talk about, and even a bike/car ride after is on the list. Marriage should include the same habit because it helps to see each other in another light than the daily house/work responsibilities.
4. Keep in touch even when away
When we date, we just cannot seem to put our phones down. We’re connected either through calls, videos, or messages. But when people get married, most couples act like they do not need to stay in touch, and the opposite partner should assume they’re okay. It would be so lovely to have someone call you back at home, and ask if you are missing them, or if you have any plans for the day, etc.
In a recent social media post, we saw celebrity couple Virat Kohli and Anushka Sharma express this very emotion. Her post was about how people say that after a while, goodbyes become easier, while that is not the case with them. It is the sweetest thing trending on the internet today.
5. Making Time to Spend ‘Quality Time’
Wasn’t this something we would fight for while dating? But when it comes to marriage, people assume that staring at the idiot box together or sitting in one room is equivalent to spending quality time. Of course, being able to live with our partner in silence is also fantastic quality, but not always. You could manage your work, your house, and your girlfriend/boyfriend before marriage and still be able to say, ‘it is all worth it for you, baby.’ Why not after your marriage then?
The thing is, we get into a comfort zone that we’re living in the same house, what more should we do? Grab a cup of coffee together in your balcony, or lie down on your bed facing each other, and just talk… Mesmerize about the times gone, and the dreams you see.
6. Marriage shouldn’t take away from your physical spark
Now when I say the word physical, I am not just talking about sex and intimacy. People around us constantly ask, what is the need to crave for fitness now? Why bother about the hair now? The question is– WHY NOT? We do not marry the one we like based on how they look, but that does not mean that marriage steals your right to continue to look like the person your partner married. Let there be the same will to look amazing for your better half. As far as physical intimacy is concerned, keep the fantasies rolling in to keep the fire alive. Don’t make it a boring late-night weekend ritual for the sake of it!!
Come to think of it, these are things that we have done already but just have cocooned our lives within a boundary that we call marriage. But in my perspective, marriage is about breaking all boundaries together and finding that comfort in one another to do all the things you could and couldn’t before. While some may think they don’t have the freedom anymore, think again; you have all the freedom in the world now. Bring back the romance, and witness the magic.
