Ditsa RathodHave you ever been in a relationship with a man-child? Let’s rephrase, have you been in a relationship where you felt like you were the mother in nurturer in the relationship, especially when it came to basic things? Well then, you know how that went! Dating a man-child is not only difficult but also stressful. But sometimes, we just cannot see it! But there are some common signs to spot it and know your next step forward.
What is a man-child?
A person with less maturity in a relationship is known as a man-child. A guy who is physically an adult but mentally as well as emotionally immature perfectly defines a man child. What’s worse is, he refuses to grow up. In this sense, they are adamant.
They are careless, irresponsible, and always want to live their life to the fullest. It is not like that they are unsuccessful, they might have good jobs and bright careers; they’re also probably very intellectual. But how are they in a relationship? Probably, a little too much to handle.
So here are 12 signs to figure if you are dating a man-child.
12 Signs You’re Dating a Man-child?
1. He is happy with the status quo
You might have observed that guys after a particular age prefer to spend maximum time with friends or colleagues. They try to avoid spending time with their parents because they want some freedom and privacy. But all guys aren’t the same. Some guys are a homebody. They like to stay at home instead of going out and chilling with friends.
These types of guys never want to make some change in life and are least interested in exploring things around them. Challenging the status quo takes commitment, courage, and dedication to learning. So they are happy with the status they have and don’t want to get out of it. Not that they should avoid their families, but they shouldn’t totally avoid a social life either, probably pushing towards the edge of being a man-child.
2. He is totally slothful
We all are humans and it is not possible to recognize a person after the first meeting. Sometimes at first, we think that a guy is super active and always wants to explore new things. But with time we realize that he is not investing enough effort into anything, especially in your relationship.
His laziness will not allow him to do anything out of the box. It’s only you who makes all the plans and takes the fruitful steps for your to bond. And what does he do? Lies around like a lazy child, or should we say, a man-child!
3. He has herd mentality:
Until a guy is not mature he will do what his friends will tell him to do. Benjamin Franklin once said, “If everyone is thinking alike, then no one is thinking”. As we know guys have larger peer groups as compared to girls. Peer groups could impact positively as well as negatively, which of course depends on perception, but several times, the impact is negative.
So an adult who is a man-child might lack in the area of having his own viewpoint. He’ll probably not have thoughts of his own, will not be able to make decisions without consulting with his friends, and might even want to include them everywhere you’ll go. Sometimes, his only reason for being in a relationship would be because his friends are in one too. So this kind of immaturity might come in the way of developing an honest bond.
4. He takes zero responsibility:
A man-child might not take the responsibility for many things. If you are having an important discussion with him, he’s not going to take the responsibility for anything. And later, don’t be surprised if he blames you. You might have noticed that children also behave similarly. They also blame their parents or siblings or friends for something for which they should be taking responsibility. This shows he has a lack of self-confidence.
5. He doesn’t get your point:
If your guy is mature, he will listen to you and will try to understand you. That doesn’t mean that he does everything you say, but it also means that he sits down to talk and listen. He should want to get to know you. But a man-child might not want to do that; you might have to keep reminding him to listen. A mature person on the other hand will respect everything you say. So having a man-child in your life as a partner will make your life lame.
6. He has no aim:
It is necessary for each and everyone to have some sort of aim in their lives. Aimless life is like traveling without knowing your destination. If a guy is not focused on his work, doesn’t have a dream, is just living on, then there are high chances that he is a man-child. He generally hates his job, never makes any effort for polishing his skills, and is not attracted to growing further. Most of his free time might also be unproductive. Nothing could be more childish than that at an age when competition is on an all-time high. Be careful of aimless people!
7. He is apathetic:
And that means he won’t commit to you literally for anything in his life. Maybe it’s his fear of commitment because of a lack of self-confidence. Without commitment, nothing is possible whether it is a business, a hobby, a dream, or a relationship. In simple terms, he’s a guy with fewer feelings. A man who is not even sure about his feelings is uncertain, and indecisive at every stage in his life as well as in his relationships. Maybe it’s time you get out of it before you hurt yourself!
8. He is cold-hearted:
We all have almost heard the phrase “cold-hearted.” In simple words, a cold-hearted man will feel a lot less. No one is born that way, there’s usually always a reason. But by the time a child grows into an adult, and cannot express even the most basic of the feelings, it could be difficult. But what’s worse is, he just hates emotions, doesn’t want to listen to you about yours, or doesn’t want to share his!
9. He disappoints you every time:
There are problems in every relationship but they need to be resolved. We have to work so much on our relationships, and the major work is figuring out our expectations and whether our partners can meet them or not. A man-child will keep disappointing you. If you feel hurt over his words and behavior, there might not be much he can do to fix it. Some problems and fights are bound to happen, but that’s different from you always being the one making him understand things.
10. He is a cry baby:
Of course, expectations hurt. And when you will start accepting whatever is happening in your life, your life will be easier. But for accepting the reality, one should be mature enough. If a man always complains, about the littlest things, he is a man-child. The food, the place, the money, the pressure, the place, the people… everything cannot be all wrong! There is a lot of dissatisfaction in his life and you will end up listening to him cry all your life!
11. He throws tantrums:
Throwing tantrums is so silly and childish. If there’s something you cannot do, a man-child will surely throw tantrums, a behavior commonly observed in kids. Either he will scream or give you the cold shoulder. Try judging your man by saying no, and see the reaction that comes. A man-child will not react how you would expect a man because he can’t take no for an answer.
12. He can’t take jokes:
A man-child’s most distinct quality is that he can’t take jokes, again, much like kids. Everything is fine until he’s making fun of somebody or their feelings, but the moment someone jokes about him, he will be mad at everyone involved.
How to deal with a man-child?
These were the 12 signs of a man-child. After reading this, you must be thinking of how to deal with a man-child just in case you are dating one! Let me tell you, it is not easy. Pull the strings off if you’re not too emotionally attached before it starts to stress you. If it is just a starting stage of a relationship, then breaking up with a man-child is the best you can do.
But if you are totally into it then you have to deal with the help of your maturity. As we know, a man-child is one who refuses to grow up. You have to tackle him like a parent. But, it’s for you to decide if that’s something you like doing.
On the other hand, if you try to change him, disagree with his views, or stop him from doing what he wants to do, it could break into a fight, one that might take a while to end. In such situations, compromise is what you can do. Develop together some healthy relationship habits to take it to the next step.
Secondly, try to make him realize what he actually feels for you. This might help him express his feelings and emotions. In this situation, never make him feel alone. He needs someone who genuinely cares for him. If his family is aware of your relationship, then talk to his parents. Try to make them understand what his son is going through.
Understanding is the main backbone of every happy relationship. So, understand him and love him because where there is love there is life. But then, always make sure it is what YOU want, and not what YOU NEED to do. Life with a man-child might not be as convenient.
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“a cold-hearted man will feel a lot less. No one is born that way, there’s usually always a reason.”
You should look for children and mothers with high testosterone levels. There is a certain percentage of people that are born cold.
You should work a month in the kindergarden. There are little children and few of them are cold.
Accept the fact.
Hi! Thank you for reading my article and taking the time to leave your review on it. As a matter of fact, I worked in Kindergarten for 3 years before I became a writer and certified Coach. We’ve all seen different cultures, and upbringings, and had different experiences, and it wouldn’t be wrong to say that exceptions are always there. This article is directed towards those men who refuse to become mature individuals despite expecting maturity from women. It’s directed towards the men who refuse to grow up. I hope this clears that up 🙂